'America's Next Top Model': Let's get on with it

Variety - Los Angeles, CA, USA - The season preem of each cycle of “America’s Next Top Model” is a throwaway episode to me. We get to know some girls who don’t make it to the top 13 (or, er, 14 this season); we don’t get to know girls who make it; and we aren’t made to care about any of them yet. Ultimately we end up with a collection of pretty girls who fill the same slots every year: the nice one, the mean one, the angry one, etc. Honestly, this show doesn’t really kick in for me until makeover week.

The school theme they use throughout the episode wears thin quickly, never moreso than with Tyra’s over-the-top homecoming queen act. We get the usual walking lesson from Miss J (school marm is not her best look), then the girls pose for photos. And then there are some catfights and violent threats. Yawn.

Then we get to casting panel, probably the most interesting part of any episode one. The various hard-luck stories include abuse, single motherhood, boyfriend in Iraq, has tried out for ANTM eight times (um, move on?), grew up Mormon, married at 17, and then one I hope to never hear again: female genital mutilation for the contestant from Somalia. Yikes. Also, one girl is drinking her own breast milk while separated from her child. Maybe having an infant at home is a reason to not participate in a reality TV contest? Just a suggestion.